Blame it on my boots 
My two-toned roots 
That show through 
My gorgeous hair 
The first one to know 
The first one I'd show 
You'd understand 
When I dropped my underwear 
 
And I saw the surprise 
And the look in your eyes 
Turned up my Budweiser 
And toasted you 
Knew you'd understand 
I'm still a man 
And there are some things 
One just has to do 
 
Cause' I've got a rash in low places   (CHORUS)  
Where the skin is red 
And the ointment chases  
The itch away, I'll be okay 
The doctor said I'm not contagious 
Hang in there and be courageous 
Cause' I've got a rash in low places 
 
Well, I knew it was wrong 
When you found that thong 
When it fell, off the rocking chair 
Darling don't be so mean 
And cause a big scene 
Don't know where it came from 
Honey, I swear 
 
Cause' I've got a rash in low places  (CHORUS)  
Where the skin is red 
And the ointment chases 
The itch away, I'll be okay 
The doctor said I'm not contagious 
Hang in there, and be courageous 
Cause' I've got a rash in low places 
 
(Well not quite Garth Brooks)
Barry A. Lanier
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/b-rash-in-low-places-sing-along/